The Extrapolater

You’d think a conference boasting Trojans and Beavers would yield a little more talent. But I had to really scour the rosters to come up with enough WRs to fill the slate this week. Thank goodness for Washington State, is all I can say.

In a related note, there’s no USC QB controversy here - John David Booty is our choice until Mark Sanchez embraces the nickname “Dirty”. But It’s shocking the state the USC roster is in - without Booty, they would have been shut out.

Here are your Pac Ten Porn Name All-Stars:

Offense
John David Booty - QB - USC
Nate Longshore - QB - Cal
Bryan Van Meter - QB - Cal

Terry Longbons - RB - Arizona
Tracy Slocum - RB - Cal
Skyler Jessen - RB - Washington State
Michael Pitre - FB - UCLA

Rod Rivera - WR - Arizona
Randy Johnson - WR - Washington State
Aaron McVein - WR - Oregon
Brandon Powers - WR - Oregon State
Matt Sledge - WR - Washington State
Reid Forrest - WR - Washington State
Romeo Savant - TE - Washington
Ed Dickson - TE - Oregon

Wider McAndrews - OL - Oregon State
Joe Longacre - OL - Arizona
Brandon Rodd - OL - Arizona State
Ryan Pohl - OL - Oregon State
Andy Levitre - OL - Oregon State
Ryan Bush - OL - Washington
Brian De La Puente - OL - Cal

Defense

Darius Savage - DL - UCLA
Nick Wood - DL - Washington
Cutter Rains - DL - Washington State
Brandon Bair - DL - Oregon
Chris Horn - DL - Stanford
Hayden Piper - DL - Oregon

Greg Van Hoesen - LB - Cal
Joey LaRocque - LB - Oregon State
E.J. Savannah - LB - Washington
D.J. Holt - LB - Cal
Eric Rider - LB - Oregon State
Keith Pankey - LB - Oregon State

Chris Baloney - DB - Arizona State
Brandon Hardin - DB - Oregon State
Glenn Love - DB - UCLA
Kenny Long - DB - Stanford
Angelo Fobbs-Valentino - DB - Arizona State
Sean Cattouse - DB - Cal

Special Teams
Jared Ballman - P - Washington
Morgan Flint - K - Oregon
Greg Laybourn - KR - Oregon State
Adam Speer - LS - Oregon State

Now, I acknowledge that Cutter Rains sounds more like a soap star, or one of Rick and AJ’s buds on Simon & Simon, but you have to work with what you’re given in this genre. Honestly, the fact that there’s a lineman with the first name Wider makes up for just about every weak name on this list, in my humble opinion.

Next week, we’ve finally reached the SEC. Are they really, inch-for-inch, the best conference in America?

I promised to be a believer if Kansas came back from a two-game road swing undefeated, so here I am, in the unaccustomed position of believing that a Kansas football team can and should win every game they play in.

Some will look at the final score of 19-11 and say it was closer than it should be, but it really wasn’t. A&M only started to make progress when Kansas shifted to the chickenshit prevent in the fourth quarter. I understand the desire to protect against the big play, but when you’ve dominated a team so completely on the defensive side of the ball, is it wise to change your approach? Evidence says no, even though the Jayhawks won.

Much was made, and rightly so, of the fact that Kansas has recruited Texans who are winning in their home state when necessary. But the game ball goes to Lawrence, Kansas native Brandon McAnderson. The Senior Fullback turned power runner gashed A&M for 21 carries, 183 yards, and 2 TDs. Even after a 30-yard run, the 235 pounder would lower his shoulder and dish out a lick to the unfortunate db who tried to tackle him (click on the thumbnail above for photographic evidence).

Kansas as a team showed great discipline, committing few penalties and zero turnovers against a good defensive unit. Kerry Meier did very little, so I’ll spare you my look inside his numbers and reiterate that perhaps it’s time to use the backup QB as a decoy from time to time.

Nebraska is up next. Obviously this isn’t your father’s Nebraska, or even your slightly older brother’s Nebraska, but they can get frisky, so I hope Mangino keeps the colts settled down and focused on the prize - a season-ending matchup with Missouri in Arrowhead Stadium for (hopefully) all of the Big 12 North marbles. At least the game is in Lawrence this year.

I could get used to this.

(Some of you may be wondering why I’m doing game recaps. I don’t usually do this. First of all - it’s my alma mater, Second - 8-0 only happens in basketball, Third - Don’t act like you watched the Kansas game and already knew all of this. Fuckin’ Liars.)

Whenever you talk backup singing, you have to start with the Pips. What other backup singers were so beloved that fans actually aspired to stand behind the lead? Fans would line up to sing “shoop shoop” behind Gladys Knight.

Here’s the pinnacle, the classic “Midnight Train to Georgia”:

Too much for the man…
He couldn’t make it!

He said he’s go-in’!

(goin’ back to find)

Leavin!

Leavin’ on a midnight train…

(goin’ back to find)

Whenever he takes that ride, guess who’s gonna be right by his side?

I know you will!

Leavin’ on that midnight traiiiin to Georgia…whoo whoo!

(live in his world)

That… world… is his… his n’ hers alone…

(drea-min)

A superstar, but he didn’t get far.

Dreams don’t always come true, nah-ah, no, nah-ah!

Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoooo

Woo-hoo-hooooo-hoo!

Leavin!

Leavin’ on that midnight traiiin.

(goin’ back to find)

Whenever he takes that ride, guess who’s gonna be right by his side?

I know you will!

Leavin’ on a midnight train to Georgiaaaa, woo hoo!

(live in his world)

That… world… is his… his n’ hers alone…

(leavin)

Leavin’ on a midnight train…

(goin’ back to find)

Whenever he takes that ride, guess who’s gonna be right by his side?

I know you will!

Leavin’ on a midnight train to Georgiaaaa, woo hoo!

(live in his worlllld)

Her… world… is his… his n’ hers alone…

One love, all aboard! (repeat x5)

One love, all aboard… Midnight Train to go! (repeat x5)

Goosebumps, baby.

Next week, Hall & Oates.

I won’t lie. As much as I try to be flexible and open-minded, I hate change. When the NCAA started monkeying with the nomenclature of Division I football, I thought it was stupid. I felt that everyone knew and understood the old way. I felt it was a valid concept. I felt like it was some sort of nod to political correctness (”We don’t see you as lesser football teams, just teams that get to play for a real national championship, so let’s use that!”).

Now, honestly, I’m not quite as certain.

Initially, this looked like double-speak. It was taking something clear (to me) and replacing it with something confusing. The two terms are still a bit clunky and the acronyms are too similar at first glance to work very well as identifiers, but after reading the NCAA rationale for the change, I have to admit that the attempt was probably a good idea. Here’s a quote from the NCAA document abolishing the 1-A, 1-AA, and 1-AAA monikers:

In supporting the new labels, it was noted that Division I-A conferences attempt to brand each individual conference during the regular football season and seldom have used the Division I-A label. Division I-AA institutions and conferences tend to use references to Division I-AA football more often, but find the term confusing and misapplied by the public, boosters and media when referring not only their football programs but their overall athletics programs. The label Division I-AAA has no meaning beyond noting that the institution or conference does not sponsor football and elimination of its use should have no detrimental impact.

[document]

That… errr… makes sense. Having a 1-AAA label to denote the absence of the sport in question does, in fact, seem stupid. I also have to admit that I occasionally mistakenly applied the 1-AA tag to a school’s basketball program where it had no business being, or confused it with Division II.

So, in theory, I must now admit that I accept the change. It’s pretty clear when you see the labels fully written out - One group of schools plays postseason bowl games, the other plays a championship tournament. No sweat.

But the whole FBS/FCS thing has to go. I realize “subdivision” is accurate, but it’s a mouthful. And a reader coming across either term in print has to stop and say “Wait, if it has a ‘B’, it’s 1-A, and if it has a ‘C’, it’s 1-AA.” In that way, it hasn’t really done away with the offending terms, it has simply caused writers and readers to break out the decoder ring on a daily basis. As a method for shortening an unwieldy three-word label, the acronym approach isn’t working. For one thing, we know we’re talking football, so let’s drop the “F”.

I admit, I’m not sure how to solve the problem. I don’t want the NCAA to create yet another term for next season - that would be even more confusing. So, given the label we already have, what can we use for shorthand? Bowl vs. Champ? It just sounds so informal. In a way, calling one subdivision “Championship” really underlines the fact that the Bowl system doesn’t produce a true champion, and I can’t imagine that’s what the NCAA wanted.

I think the greatest minds of the blogosphere can work this out. Let’s hear your ideas in the comment field.

Found on Storming the Floor

The Big Ten might be a couple of inches short of the Big 12, but they more than make up for it with a brimming cornucopia (seasonal reference!) of hot porn names. It starts with Juice Williams and ends with Clint Huntrods, and it’s nothing but fun in-between.

Here are your Big Ten Porn Name All-Stars:

Offense

Juice Williams - QB - Illinois
Marvin McNutt - QB - Iowa
Jake Swank - QB - Purdue
Jacob Ball - QB - Michigan State

Amir Pinnix - RB - Minnesota
Iroc Duncan - RB - Purdue
Tom Busch - RB - Iowa
A.J. Jimmerson - RB - Michigan State
Jared Crank - FB - Purdue

Terry Love - WR - Michigan State
LaTerryal Savoy - WR - Michigan
Eric Peterman - WR - Northwestern
Nick Polk - WR - Indiana
Jack Eastman - WR - Illinois
Taurian Washington - WR - Ohio State
Zach Furlong - TE - Iowa
Blake Powers - TE - Indiana

Jon Asamoah - OL - Illinois
Kenny Love - OL - Indiana
Mark Huyge - OL - Michigan
John Masters - OL - Michigan State
Kyle Stout - OL - Penn State
Dirk Watters - OL - Wisconsin
Jake Long - OL - Michigan

Defense

Grant McCracken - DL - Iowa
Marques Slocum - DL - Michigan
Jonal Saint-Dic - DL - Michigan State
Patrick Butrym - DL - Wisconsin
Kirk DeCremer - DL - Wisconsin
Arik Wolf - DL - Indiana

Antonio Steele - LB - Illinios
Mike Humpal - LB - Iowa
Deon Hightower - LB - Minnesota
Prince Kwateng - LB - Northwestern
Clay Nurse - LB - Illinois
Culmer St. Jean - LB - Wisconsin

Antonio Gully - DB - Illinois
Johnny Sears - DB - Michigan
Daron Love - DB - Minnesota
Ben Gummo - DB - Penn State
Spencer Ridenhour - DB - Penn State
Frank Duong - DB - Purdue

Special Teams
Ken DeBauche - P - Wisconsin
Austin Starr - K - Indiana
Major Ramsey - KR - Indiana
Clint Huntrods - LS - Iowa

Sometimes, when I’m nearing the end of the alphabet of teams in a given conference, I’m still sweating the details: “Will I find a Kicker? Are there enough Linebackers?  Have I overused ‘Long’ and ‘Love’?”. Not this time. Every single category filled up fast, and I had to leave some good - but not great - ones on the cutting room floor.

Big Ten, we salute you.

Next week, we quit worrying openly about how “Big” our conference is, and just go ahead and Pac Ten.

It was a predictably difficult 19-14 win for Kansas in Boulder, but believe me, this is progress. Only a follower of Kansas or Colorado would know how many times these games have gone the other way, with Kansas folding late on the road instead of holding on by their fingernails for the win. Bottom line, the Jayhawks found a way to win on the road, a skill that has eluded Mangino’s teams since he’s been hired.

You know by now that my way of getting inside the numbers is to look at the fate of former starter, now backup QB Kerry Meier. The Kansas gameplan is using every football instinct encoded in the Meier DNA, from throwing to running to catching, and even punting. Kerry’s brother Shad was a tight end at K-State years back, and made the NFL in that capacity - Kerry is often used as a pseudo-TE - check. His brother Dylan just completed his QB tenure at K-State - Meier started 8 games at QB for Kansas - check. Meier liked to run from the QB position last year, and missed games due to injury from that contact - check. Punting…. I don’t know where that came from, but apparently Meier has been efficient at that since his high school days as well.

Perhaps the greatest thing to happen to KU was Dylan Meier’s presence as K-State QB two years ago. Rather than sit behind his older sibling, Kerry came to “the enemy”, and that has made a whale of a difference for the crimson and blue.

Here are Meier’s subdued stats from the Colorado game: three receptions for 15 yards.

Something about all of this feels like a trick play in the making. Part of the value of the slash-type player is the potential for diversion he provides. So far, most every time Meier has been in the game, he has been the target of the play. Opponents are being conditioned to expect him to get the ball. In a tight game, I would not be at all surprised to see him trot in and take a fake handoff, or catch a lateral from Reesing and throw for a TD. His versatility and willingness are a wonderful weapon to hold in reserve, not to mention that if Reesing goes down, KU fans will feel completely comfortable with Meier under center for the rest of the season.

In the meantime, Reesing has shown why he won the job this season. He hit for 20/29 passing, including a beautiful wide-open scoring play to TE Derek Fine. He also took to his feet when things got rough, gouging the Buffs for 84 yards on broken plays. He was the leading rusher for the Jayhawks, in fact.

Off to Texas A&M next. Sorry to say it, Semitough, but I would LOVE for Kansas to silence the twelfth man next weekend.

via EDSBS and Pete Jayhawk

“It’s time for (Larry Johnson) to take the diaper off and go play.” - Dick Vermeil, 2004

I make no bones of the fact that I am a homer. I root for all things Kansas University and Kansas City, because that’s what I grew up with. But that means I root for the franchise, and if an individual player punks the franchise, I have problems with that.

The object of my ire this week is Chiefs running back Larry Johnson, who finally scored his first touchdown of the season in a romp agains the Cincinnati Bengals, a team that was starting a down lineman in their decimated linebacker corps.

Larry has done great things for the Chiefs, without a doubt. His previous two seasons, and the amazing ten-game clinic he put on in 2004 following a Priest Holmes injury, are worthy accomplishments which I will not denigrate. What I will take issue with is the fact that LJ seems to think that those stellar seasons have exempted him from any need for improvement.

The Chiefs’ running game thrived under Dick Vermiel because the passing game was so potent. Holmes and Johnson had an all-pro offensive line to run behind, the efficacy of which was proven by the success two very different runners had within the system. Under Herm Edwards, the system is different, the linemen are different, and the QB is different. Yards have been hard to come by, and Larry has pouted. In the Cincinnati game, he pulled his team out of the red zone by slamming the ball to the turf after a negative-yardage play, drawing a penalty. And this was in a game that his team was winning.

In addition, LJ’s poor blocking was extremely evident in this last weekend’s game. While I don’t expect him to get to every blitzer who comes through, I do expect him to look like he wants to. On a couple of replays, Johnson made minimal effort to stop defensive players from leveling his QB - it was just that obvious. Now, if I were paid to lug the rock, I wouldn’t want to block, either. But even I know that failure in the passing game leads to fewer opportunities in the running game.

Now, to clear one thing up. I am not picking on Larry Johnson because I was spoiled by the high-flying Vermeil offense. I grew up with the likes of Christian Okoye and Barry Word in the Chiefs backfield, and I freaking loved it. LJ is my kind of runner, and I love it that he can catch the ball out of the backfield, and dish out punishment. I just want to see more determination and less pouting, QUITE FRANKLY.

Many Chiefs fans are also deploring LJ’s holdout this season, but I am not one of them. While I do wish it hadn’t been necessary, I believe that Larry’s demands were legitimate - he is the future of this organization, and he was ridden hard in 2006, to the tune of a record-setting 416 carries. Tack on a career-high 41 catches that went for two more TDs, and the Chiefs organization would seem to owe Larry Johnson one hell of a lot. The NFL does not have a history of taking care of its own, nor does Carl Peterson. Johnson deserved a raise, and he should have had it before camp started.

So, basically, it comes down to “yeah, things suck right now.” So the question then becomes: is our franchise back going to throw tantrums about it, or is he going to try a new approach? If Larry Johnson wants to be “the Man” in K.C., he has to make his detractors eat their words the way that winners always do - by refusing to play the victim, and showing what he’s really about.

The best revenge is living well. Just ask Peyton Manning.